Three Commandments to Love

Rabbi Lisa Edwards
Beth Chayim Chadashim (BCC)
Parshat Acharei Mot/Kedoshim: Leviticus 16:1-20:27
Haftorah Portion: Amos 9: 7-15

Since it was published and won a National Jewish Book Award in 2008, I've been happily making my way each week through The Torah: A Women's Commentary (URJ Press and Women of Reform Judaism, NY 2008). As promised, it is a scholarly and poetic Torah commentary written entirely by women - well over a hundred scholars, rabbis, teachers, poets, writers - bringing their hearts and minds, women's points of view, women's voices - FINALLY - to the study of Torah and Jewish traditions. It's a book I hope will be welcomed by every Jew more interested in inclusion than exclusion.

Within that commentary, Rabbi Elyse Goldstein, in her essay on parashat K'doshim, notes that its main word, k'doshim - a word we usually translate as "holy" - is never really defined in its Torah portion. Rashi and Ramban interpret the oft repeated phrase 'you shall be holy' to mean 'you shall be separate.' "For them," Goldstein writes, "holiness requires standing apart as Jews, with a firm sense of boundaries." Then Goldstein questions whether a Jewish definition of holiness must necessarily imply the "building of fences." She offers us a challenge that should resonate with those of us who belong to the Southern California Board of Rabbis or participate in the Jewish Federation, two organizations that strive to bring Jews together in common purpose, even while recognizing the great diversity within Jewish community. Perhaps, says Rabbi Goldstein, "it is time to begin redefining the mitzvot as connectors rather than as boundaries, as dialogue rather than as answers," (p.719).

Mitzvot as connectors; Jews in dialogue.

Isn't that indeed what we do here in 2009, both within the walls of 6505 Wilshire and when we walk out from these doors and into the larger LA Jewish community?

Dr. Tamara Cohn Eskenazi, another of the scholars and co-editor of the commentary, takes up Rabbi Goldstein's challenge to become holy by connecting rather then separating. She takes note of the fact that "God commands Israel to 'love' three times in the Torah." We all know that in the Shema we are commanded 'to love God with all your heart' (Deut. 6:5). Dr. Eskenazi points out that the other two commandments to love come in Parshat K'doshim where we are told first, to love the one who is a member of one's group ("love your fellow [Israelite] as yourself," 19:18), and second, to "love the stranger," (19:34). Dr. Eskenazi writes: "Loving the stranger is a unique notion in the ancient world. The verse's rationale for loving the stranger - 'for you were strangers in the land of Egypt' - has continuing ramifications that are often overlooked: the proper response to having suffered abuse is not vengeance or special entitlement, but rather sensitivity and determination to prevent such an abuse of others, including strangers. "The three commandments [to love] are three dimensions of a single, deep connection: to love God is to love others, those like us and those who are not," (p.716).

We all know well how the categories can overlap - how kin can become estranged, but also how strangers can become dear friends.

Because I am the rabbi of a community - a congregation - that was founded 36 years ago by Jews who were treated as strangers by the larger Jewish community, Rabbi Goldstein's and Dr. Eskanazi's observations ring true for me. In 1972, a small group of gay and lesbian Jews thought to create a congregation that would keep them connected to Judaism when other Jews were attempting to build fences, to separate us, to call us "strangers" when in fact we were part of their "family." Today our congregation- Beth Chayim Chadashim (BCC) "House of New Life" - is a thriving congregation of gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, and heterosexual Jews, our allies and friends, who come together in pursuit of tikkun olam and a strong, friendly Jewish community. 

Perhaps God's commandments to love your fellow and to love the stranger come together here in Parashat Kedoshim in order to suggest that God's commandments to love are not so difficult to fulfill after all, for when we turn to one another with open eyes and open hearts, 
soon strangers and the estranged become known to us, 
and then become dear to us, 
and then become the ones we love.

At our synagogue, we embrace the importance of this theme by reading the following interpretation of the Shema Veahavta - from the third time God commands us to love - written by BCC member Bracha Yael. Please feel free to include it in your services.

Hear O Israel

Just as God is One, So are We!

Just as you shall love your God with all your heart, with all your soul, 
and with all your might, so shall you love all people. 

Teach love, compassion and understanding to your children 
when you sit in your home, while you walk on your way, 
when you retire and when you arise.

Bind these words as a sign upon your arm so that you may 
fight against prejudice, between your eyes so that you may 
not be blind to the suffering of others, and write them
on the doorposts of your homes and gates so that 
you remind yourself and others that intolerance 
will not be tolerated within these walls.